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Re: [LUG] OT: Spelling religious war flamebait

 

Zis iz so funi. Zankyu. 

On Fri, 14 Dec 2012 12:00:40 +0000
Simon Robert -Cottage <simon.robert@xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx> wrote:

> The European Commission has just announced an agreement whereby English 
> will be the official language of the EU rather than German which was the 
> other possibility.
> 
> As part of the negotiations, Her Majesty's Government conceded that 
> English spelling had some room for improvement and has accepted a five 
> year phase-in plan that would be known as "Euro-English".
> 
> In the first year, "s" will replace the soft "c". Sertainly, this will 
> make the sivil servants jump with joy. The hard "c" will be dropped in 
> favour of the "k". This should klear up konfusion and keyboards kan have 
> 1 less letter.
> 
> There will be growing publik enthusiasm in the sekond year, when the 
> troublesome "ph" will be replaced with "f". This will make words like 
> "fotograf" 20% shorter.
> 
> In the 3rd year, publik akseptanse of the new spelling kan be ekspekted 
> to reach the stage where more komplikated changes are possible. 
> Governments will enkorage the removal of double letters, which have 
> always ben a deterent to akurate speling. Also, al wil agre that the 
> horible mes of the silent "e"s in the language is disgraseful, and they 
> should go away.
> 
> By the fourth year, peopl wil be reseptiv to steps such as replasing 
> "th" with "z" and "w" with "v". During ze fifz year, ze unesesary "o" 
> kan be dropd from vords kontaining "ou" and similar changes vud of kors 
> be aplid to ozer kombinations of leters.
> 
> After zis fifz yer, ve vil hav a reli sensibl riten styl. Zer vil be no 
> mor trubl or difikultis and evrivun vil find it ezi to understand ech 
> ozer. Ze drem vil finali kum tru! And zen world!
> 
> 
> 
> 
> On 13/12/12 12:07, Neil Winchurst wrote:
> > On 13/12/12 11:24, Gordon Henderson wrote:
> >> On Thu, 13 Dec 2012, Philip Hudson wrote:
> >>
> >>> On 13 Dec, 2012, at 9:45 am, tom wrote:
> >>>
> >>>> You say UK spelling is perverse
> >>>
> >>> Through
> >>> Tough
> >>> Cough
> >>> Plough
> >>> Thorough
> >>> Thought
> >>
> >> You forgot the obvious: Ghoti.
> >>
> >> Gordon
> >>
> > Meaning fish, no doubt. But then in my family we call fish foe-tee 
> > because we say it could be spelt photi.
> >
> > Neil
> >
> 


-- 
Egon Spengler <migel_wimtore@xxxxxxx>

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